Escape to Paradise: Inani Hotels Morningstar, Pretoria!
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because we're diving headfirst into the "Escape to Paradise: Inani Hotels Morningstar, Pretoria!" and, let me tell you, it's not all sunshine and rainbows (though, spoiler alert: there is a pool with a view). This is going to be a real, unfiltered look, warts and all, because let's be honest, who needs another perfectly polished travel brochure?
First Impressions: The Arrival & the Grind
So, Pretoria, right? Beautiful jacaranda trees (when they're blooming, anyway, saw zero in their off season) and a whole lot of…well, quiet. Finding the hotel was fine, no major dramas. Accessibility wise, the website claims to cater for those with mobility issues. I always take that with a pinch of salt until boots are on the ground. The elevator was thankfully working, a big plus when I saw the High floor views! Check-in was…efficient. Not overly friendly, not overly rude. Contactless check-in/out option, which is great if you're a germaphobe like me (or, you know, just generally sane these days).
The lobby itself was…pretty standard hotel lobby, nothing to write home about. Though, the 24-hour front desk is a lifesaver, no matter how weary you are after a long day.
Rooms: Where the Magic (or the Mild Disappointment) Happens
Okay, the room. My little sanctuary. Let's dissect this thing. My room, the Non-smoking one (thank God), was spacious enough. Air conditioning was blasting, which was fantastic in the Pretoria heat. Coffee/tea maker? Check. Free Wi-Fi in all rooms?! YES! That's the kind of luxury I thrive on, or at least, hope for. Free bottled water? Again, a winner. The extra long bed was a definite plus, because, you know, leg room is important in the grand scheme of things.
Now, for the details… The bathroom was clean, everything worked. Additional toilet was so satisfying. The bathtub was tempting, even if I'm not much of a bath person. The slippers were a nice touch, a good way to unwind after a long day of working, though I do not see myself using them. Blackout curtains are crucial when fighting jet lag. My room also had a seating area, great for that morning coffee, or just to get some work done away from the main desk, but I didn’t really use it. There's also the In-room safe box, a must. But for me, it was the Window that opens! I hate rooms where I can't get fresh air.
Oh, and the TV? Full of channels. Satellite/cable channels, so you're sorted on that. And there were also the Alarm clock, Desk, Ironing facilities, Mini bar and Mirror.
The Food Game: A Gastronomic Adventure (or Something Like It)
Alright, let's talk grub. The Breakfast [buffet] in the restaurant was, let's just say, "adequate." The Asian breakfast, which honestly didn't make a whole lot of sense where I was at, was a bit dodgy, so I stuck to the Western options. (Though I did see someone try the Asian cuisine in restaurant – brave souls!). Coffee/tea in restaurant? Present. Breakfast service? Yes. A la carte in restaurant for lunch and dinner, and there's a Snack bar for when you fancy a quick bite.
The Poolside bar sounded amazing, but the reality was a little less glamourous. Still, the Bottle of water was welcome, and the atmosphere was pretty chilled. The Desserts in restaurant always called to me, and were worth every calorie. Was there a Vegetarian restaurant? I can't say for sure, but it wasn't obvious.
Amenities & Relaxation: The Promise of Paradise (and What Actually Happened)
Okay, this is where things get interesting. Swimming pool [outdoor]? Absolutely. And it had a view! (I already told you that). Very Instagrammable (if you're into that sort of thing). The Pool with view was the biggest selling point for me.
The Spa/sauna was a draw, so I booked a massage. Okay, so here's the deal: they do offer a Body scrub and Foot bath. The massage itself was…okay. Let's leave it at that.
Then there's the Fitness center. I peeked in. Looked like a decent gym, the kind where you'd be comfortable spending some time if you are into fitness.
Cleanliness and Safety: Is it Safe?
Thankfully, the hotel goes all-out to make you feel safe. There were Anti-viral cleaning products, Daily disinfection in common areas, and Rooms sanitized between stays. Staff trained in safety protocol, which is always reassuring. Plus, the Hand sanitizer was readily available. Cashless payment service was a winner! And for the paranoid among us (like me!), you can opt to have your room sanitized. Shared stationery removed is another plus.
The Nitty-Gritty: The Good, The Bad, and the Slightly Odd
- Internet Access: The Wi-Fi [free] was actually decent. A huge relief. The Internet access – LAN existed but I didn’t bother with it.
- Business Stuff: They have Meeting/banquet facilities and Business facilities, including a Xerox/fax in business center. The presence of Audio-visual equipment for special events might be good, but I didn't need it.
- For the Kids: There are Kids facilities and Babysitting service, so families are definitely catered for.
- Getting Around: Airport transfer is available, which is a convenience. Plenty of Car park [free of charge] and Car park [on-site] as well.
- Services and Conveniences: Concierge. Dry cleaning. Laundry service. Luggage storage – everything you'd expect.
- Things to do: Not much advertised, but they do offer Car power charging station, for electric cars.
The Quirks and Imperfections
Okay, here's the real stuff. There were a couple of times when I felt like the staff could have been slightly more friendly on a personal level (but hey, maybe they're just having a bad day). The food, as mentioned before, wasn't exactly Michelin-star material. One minor thing: the Hot water in my shower took a while to heat up in the mornings. Small things.
The "Escape to Paradise" Verdict (and My Honest Recommendation)
Listen. "Escape to Paradise: Inani Hotels Morningstar, Pretoria!" isn't perfect. It's not quite a tropical island. But it's clean, it's comfortable, and the pool view is genuinely lovely. It's a solid choice for business travelers, families, or anyone looking for a relatively uncomplicated stay with good basics, and a nice pool.
Here's the Deal: My Unfiltered Offer (And Why You Should Book)
Stop dreaming! Book your escape to Escape to Paradise: Inani Hotels Morningstar, Pretoria!. Here's why:
- Free Wi-Fi that Works! You're connected, always.
- Pool with a View: That's your Instagram feed sorted.
- Clean, Safe, and Sanitized: Peace of mind is priceless.
- Great value, especially with the right offer.
Book Now & Get:
- A Complimentary upgrade to a room with view (subject to availability).
- 10% discount on spa treatments.
- Free breakfast for a party of two (for a limited time only).
Don't delay! Pretoria's jacaranda trees (or the promise of them) are waiting, and your escape to (almost) paradise is closer than you think! Click this link [insert booking link] to book your stay and get the deal.
P.S. Don't forget your sunscreen! And maybe order a pizza in and enjoy the comfort!
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Alright, buckle up, buttercups, because you're about to get a messy, opinionated, and probably slightly delirious travelogue from my recent (and let's be honest, slightly disastrous) trip to Inani Hotels Morningstar in Pretoria, South Africa. Prepare for a rollercoaster – of emotions, of questionable food choices, and of me, mostly just flailing around trying to figure out where the sun block is.
Day 1: Arrival & That Damn Airport
- 06:00 AM: Wake up. Or rather, be violently awoken by the ear-splitting alarm that screams "GET YOUR BUTT TO SOUTH AFRICA!" Bleary-eyed, I stumble into the kitchen, realize I've forgotten to pack toothpaste, and contemplate just brushing my teeth with…well, let's not go there.
- 07:00 AM: Taxi to the airport. Traffic is already trying to kill me. The driver keeps trying to sell me biltong. Dude, it’s 7 AM. My stomach is barely awake, let alone ready for dried meat things.
- 09:00 AM: Airport chaos. You know those people who calmly breeze through security? I am not one of them. I’m the panicky one frantically pulling out my laptop, emptying my pockets, and probably setting off the metal detector three times. Then, of course, the inevitable "I've lost my boarding pass!" moment. Found it, crumpled and slightly sweaty, tucked in my sock. Classy.
- 16:00 PM (After a looooong flight): Land in Johannesburg! Whew. Success! Ish. The baggage carousel is basically a conveyor belt of despair. Mine eventually surfaces, looking like it’s survived a war.
- 17:00 PM: Car rental. Let the games begin. The rental agent is chatty, the car is…not exactly what I ordered. It’s a small, very beige sedan. I name him "Bartholomew" immediately.
- 18:30 PM: Arrive at Inani Hotels Morningstar. The entrance is beautiful, all lush greenery and promise. The room? Okay, not quite the Instagram aesthetic I was hoping for. The air conditioning sounds like a jet engine, the internet barely works (a cardinal sin!), and the view of the… well, the view is mostly of a wall. Still, I try not to dwell on it; and by 20.00 PM I am in bed because there's really nothing else to do and it starts to feel like an endless day.
Day 2: Sun, Safari and… Sadness?
- 08:00 AM: Breakfast Time! They served a buffet. The sausage tasted suspiciously like it was designed to survive a nuclear winter. But the coffee? Surprisingly good! I have to remember to come prepared with my own coffee.
- 09:00 AM: Decide to explore the hotel grounds. Oh, the gardens! Absolutely stunning. I find a quiet spot, pull out my journal, and start to write. The sun is warm on my skin, the birds are singing… it's perfect. Suddenly, a rogue monkey swoops down and nabs my muffin. This, people, is the reality.
- 11:00 AM: Decide to go to the Safari. The safari was the whole reason for coming, and from what I know, Safari is the coolest thing to do. I'm so excited! I did tons of research. The car is nice however. The tour guide is absolutely incredible… but also, I am the only person on the tour. I quickly spiral into a mild existential crisis. Is this how my life ends? Me, alone, with a giraffe and the feeling of the whole world is observing me.
- 16:00 PM: Take a nap. The safari tour takes so much energy, and the whole world is observing me.
- 18:00 PM: Dinner at the hotel restaurant. I order the "chef's special." It's… ambiguous. Let's just say I spent the next hour questioning every single ingredient.
Day 3: Pretoria Adventures, The Great Museum Heist (Of My Attention!)
- 09:00 AM: Force myself out of bed. Today, I'm conquering Pretoria! (Or at least, trying. My inner couch potato is putting up a fight.)
- 10:00 AM: The Voortrekker Monument. Okay, the architecture is impressive. The history? A bit…intense. I wander around, trying to soak it all in, but my attention span is about as long as a goldfish's. Suddenly, I'm convinced a ghost is following me but then… Oh, it's just the wind.
- 13:00 PM: Quick stop at a local cafe. I order a milkshake, then proceed to spill half of it down my front. So much for looking cultured.
- 14:00 PM: National Museum. Okay, I went. And the reality is that museums are just not my thing. I tried. I really did. But the exhibits start to blur together, my feet hurt, and I’m pretty sure I’m developing museum fatigue.
Day 4: Rest, Recharge, and the Truth About Laundry
- 09.00 AM: That jet engine AC I mentioned? It’s decided to become even louder overnight. I call reception, complain half-heartedly, then go back to bed.
- 11:00 AM: Actually, I just stay in bed all day. This is the vacation. The ultimate reset. I binge-watch terrible TV, order room service (which arrives 45 minutes later), and generally wallow in a blissful state of absolute laziness. I realise I need to book a flight home.
- 15:00 PM: Realise my laundry is piling up. I attempt to use the hotel laundry service. Two hours later, I have an email saying the laundry has disappeared! My clothes! They’re gone! I launch a full-scale investigation, which basically involves wandering around the hotel lobby looking bewildered. Never, ever trust hotel laundry.
- 19:00 PM: Decide that, what the hell, I'm going to have another dinner at the hotel, because its easier. This time, I pick something that looks safe: the plain grilled chicken. It’s actually, genuinely, pretty good. At the end of the day, I am happy with it.
Day 5: Leaving and, Wow, is this really it?
- 07:00 AM: Wake up. The departure day. The day of reckoning with the world of departure.
- 08:00 AM: Eat the suspicious breakfast sausage. I really dont know why i am doing this.
- 09:00 AM: Check out. The receptionist gives me a slightly pitying look, like she knows I’ve lost my spark. I blame the sausage. And the monkey. Most definitely the monkey.
- 10:00 AM: Drive Bartholomew to the airport. He survived. Mostly.
- 14:00 PM (Somewhere over the Atlantic): On the plane. Reflecting. Did I love Pretoria? Well, it was… an experience. Full of bumps and mess and unexpected turns, and the real truth is that it was absolutely me.
- 15:00 PM: Land back where it started.
So, there you have it. My messy, imperfect, and utterly human adventure in Southern Africa. Would I go back to Inani Hotels Morningstar? Perhaps. But next time, I'm bringing extra socks, my own toothpaste, and a very, very sturdy muffin proof container. And possibly a therapist. Just in case.
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So, "Escape to Paradise"? Really? In Pretoria? Did someone spike the Kool-Aid?
Okay, look, "Paradise" might be a *slight* exaggeration. Let's just say Inani Morningstar is… an *experience*. It's like, you know, when you order online and the picture is a *little* bit better than the reality? But in a charmingly Pretoria kinda way. My Uber driver, a sweet old bloke named Piet, actually guffawed when I said I was going there. "Paradise, hey? Well, you'll certainly be *escaping* something, that's for sure!" Turns out, Piet's wife used to work there! (Small world, honestly)
Right, so what *is* it actually like? Give it to me straight. No sugarcoating.
Alright, bracing answer time. Inani Morningstar definitely *feels* like a… a *transition*. Like it’s sort of stuck on the cusp of being fancy and, well, totally Pretoria. The reception? Lovely people. The lobby? Bit dated, but honestly, the chandeliers have stories, I swear. The rooms themselves… well, some are great, some… less so. I'll be honest, my first one had what I *think* was a family of tiny, incredibly shy, possibly orange, spiders living in the air-con. So, yeah, requested a room change. No biggie, handled super professionally. The second room? Much better, plus, a killer view of the pool. Small victories, people, small victories. Oh, and the WiFi… let’s just say you develop a profound appreciation for the power of a well-written postcard.
The food? Because let’s be honest, good food is a dealbreaker.
This is where things get *interesting*. The breakfast buffet? Honestly, it’s… *there*. You’ll find the usual suspects: eggs, bacon, some suspicious-looking sausages (I stuck with the toast, just sayin'). The coffee? Well, again, good enough to get the gears turning in the morning. Lunch and dinner? The menu is… expansive. It's got everything! And nothing! And everything again! One night I ordered the peri-peri chicken and, wow. The peri-peri was… adventurous. I’m pretty sure I could feel my blood vessels expanding. The next night I went for the steak. Perfectly cooked! I think the chef’s mood dictates the quality. Embrace the chaos!
The pool? Is the pool actually swim-able? (Because sometimes, you know...)
Okay, the pool. *This* is a highlight. The pool is actually fantastic! Clean, big, and perfect for a proper chill. There's a swim-up bar, which is essential, obviously. The first afternoon, I was practically glued to a sun lounger, cocktail in hand, watching the sky turn pink. Life was good. *Really* good. Until… well, okay, here’s my messy truth. I spent a little *too* much time at the swim-up bar. Let’s just say I may or may not have attempted synchronized swimming with a group of highly enthusiastic (and slightly tipsy) toddlers. The lifeguard gave me a look. I gave him a sheepish grin. We’re cool now, though. We definitely are. He's been avoiding me ever since. He's probably right to. Anyway, the pool: Excellent. Just, you know, pace yourself, and maybe steer clear of the toddlers if you're on your third margarita. Or fourth. Or… well, you get the idea.
What about the *service*? Is it, you know, actually *service*?
The service? Ah yes, Service. That ever-present thing that can make or break a stay. And this is where Inani Morningstar really shines, honestly. The staff are *amazing*. They're genuinely friendly, helpful, and they really try hard. They’re like the salt of the earth. I had a problem with my shower (the ancient spiders in my first room seem to have set off another problem). I explained it was leaking slowly to reception and they fixed it immediately. And when my attempts to order a pizza at 10pm were met with a chorus of "no pizza tonight" (Apparently the pizza chef had a prior engagement with a rugby game. Completely understandable!), the night-shift guy still found me a few slices of leftover something... (I'm pretty sure it was leftover breakfast from the buffet... but, hey, free food!). Seriously, they are rockstars.
So, give me the verdict. Should I go? Is it "Paradise" after all?
Okay, here's the brutal truth. If you're expecting pristine perfection, don't go. If you're expecting a five-star experience with flawless service, then, well, maybe look at other options. BUT! If you're looking for a genuinely authentic Pretoria experience, a place with heart, a place where a slightly-too-enthusiastic toddler synchronized swimming performance won't get you ejected, and where the staff are utter legends, then absolutely, go. Inani Morningstar is a bit rough around the edges, quirky, and sometimes a little bit… *much*. But isn't that the fun of it all? It has charm. It's not pristine, but it has soul. And, despite everything, I’d actually go back again. In fact, I'm already planning my return. Wish me luck with the swim-up bar! And the spidery situation, it's still running through my head.
Are there any activities or things to do around the hotel?
Okay, let's keep it real, Inani Morningstar isn't positioned right in the middle of the action. You're going to need to *make* your own fun, essentially. However, it's a fairly easy drive to some cool spots. The hotel offers a shuttle service, but I'd recommend either Ubering or, as Piet did say, getting a reliable driver for a fair price. The Pretoria Zoo is decent, apparently. Never went myself (too busy pondering the mysteries of the peri-peri). Then, the Union Buildings, fantastic. A must do. Also, Church Square, is close by, and worth a gander. Just don't go expecting nonstop excitement right outside the front door, otherwise, you'll be disappointed. But it's a fantastic way to experience Pretoria.
Anything I should definitely bring with me?
Sunscreen! Seriously. Pretoria sunshine isn't messing around. A good book, because, as mentioned, the wifi may or may not work, and a healthy dose of patience - and a sense of humor. Also, maybe some earplugs if you're a light sleeper or if you plan on going to bed early (Top Places To Stay
